2011 Summer Schedule

Final Spring 2011 Stats

Keep Your Heads Up, Enchiladas!!!!!

The Associated Press wasn't going to touch this one, so you are stuck with me, Jason, Roid Rage, Adam, Vesuvius, @$$hole, etc., etc., As a guest columnist on the Angry Enchilada blog, I am not going to try and match funnies with Tony.  I am just here to provide an encouraging word or two after a tough loss for the spicy queso tubes or whatever clever name Tony would come up with.

Our game against St. Losers didn't go like we all had hoped, but that's........

..........okay.  You know the rest.  So get in front of your mirror this week and remind yourself.

Sometimes no matter how focused you are, how prepared you are for a game, how much energy you have, how well you execute the fundamentals, it just doesn't go your way.  We have nothing to be ashamed of.  The way I see it, we had a strong showing for our largest home crowd of the year.

Preparedness - A+.  Despite the fact that several people didn't have spikes or a glove, thirty minutes before the game we had two players in the parking lot, and during several innings half the team didn't know what positions they were supposed to be playing, I still give us high marks.

Effort & Focus - A+.  We never gave up, giving maximum focus and effort and refusing to lose until the bitter end.

Fundamentals - A+.  Finding the fence with the back of your head.  Check.  Doing backflips while trying to catch a fly ball.  Check.  You can't have fun without fundamentals.

Mental Toughness - A+.  When you are trailing by six runs, you don't score one whole run in the last two innings without being a little tough mentally.

You get the point.  We had it all.  Sometimes you just run into a buzzsaw like St. Loser's.  Sometimes the other team is just that much older, slower, weaker, than you and it is tough to overcome.  They didn't name themselves the St. Loser's because they aren't awesome.

If we keep playing like we did on Wednesday night, things will turn around for us for sure. 

For those of you who take E-League softball too seriously, you need to relax and have fun.  Having fun is the whole point of playing sports, and who didn't have fun the other night.  I know I did.

So hold your heads high Enchiladas, we have a lot to be proud of.

Now to the game highlights (I promise it will be brief):

We racked up 6 runs, 13 hits, and a .450 batting average.  Not bad.......................If we would have been facing someone throwing 85 MPH.

The Japsican and Oompah continued their batting average battle royale.  Tony managed to find room for 3 more bleeders to land on right center field, and Doege tried to keep up with a 2-3 performance.  Maybe more of us need to have side bets. 

That's pretty much it for the highlights.

Just kidding MACnew.  I didn't forget about you.  Brian surprised everyone, including himself, with a rocket shot to third when the Loser's tried to steal a base.  They won't do that again.

And then there was Lonnie.  Lonaldihno is long gone, and I think Wonnie is gone now too.  All that's left is Eeyore.


Here is the boxscore and season stats.  Review at your own risk.



Wait, that's not it.  Let me try that again.

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ANGRY ENCHILADAS
		AB	R	H	RBI	HR	BB	K	SB	AVG
T. CISNEROS	C	3	3	3	0	0	0	0	0	0.833
J. DOEGE	LF	2	1	1	1	0	1	0	0	0.750
S. ANIOL	RCF	3	1	2	0	0	0	0	0	0.529
J. ADAM	LCF	3	1	2	2	0	0	0	0	0.571
C. GILPIN	3B	3	0	1	1	0	0	0	0	0.533
C.DOEGE	2B	1	0	0	1	0	0	0	0	0.429
L. CROSS	P	3	0	0	0	0	0	1	0	0.333
E. CERVANTES	EH	3	0	2	0	0	0	0	0	0.364
P. MOLTZ	RF	2	0	2	0	0	0	0	0	0.500
B.MCNEW (B6)	C	1	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0.364
J. HANS	1B	1	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0.467
D. THOMPSON (B4)	RF	1	0	0	0	0	1	0	0	0.474
C. KAY	SS	3	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0.267
TOTALS		29	6	13	5	0	2	1	0	0.500
BATTING
2B - J. DOEGE (3)
GIDP - HANS
RBI - J. DOEGE (7), J. ADAM 2 (11), GILPIN (6), C. DOEGE (9)
GAME DETAILS
ATTENDANCE:  9

Stenchiladas Sneak One Out

Black Doug was dealing, but in the end, well, he got bent over

SAN ANTONIO, TX (AP) - Manager Danny Thompson submitted the completely give-up lineup of "all you f*ckers are now batting in the order of batting average."   Then Black Doug started dealing pre-game.  Mindgames, gold teeph, and a high pitched voice were the concoction that put the Enchiladas into a roofie-induced-like state.  All of the feeble flautas mosied over to get their pre-game work in along the first base dugout, moderately annoyed and unfocused now because of Black Doug.  All except two.  Yes, Jason and Adam would not go gently into the night.  Rage...rage!  Against...well, against everything. 

GoodFellas leadoff hitter would hit a lazy, routine ground ball up the middle that was promptly Bucknered by shortstop Casey (KC?) Kay.  "I don't know what happened.  The whole game was a blur...I was just thinking about why my wife wasn't here and that I need to hurry up and get her some ice cream."  The ball scooted harmlessly into center where the mental juggernaut LCF Adam was.  In his overheating brain, his thermal, Predator-like vision saw the runner taking a big turn so he fired a missile at him but ended up hitting the top of the dugout instead.  This was good though, because Hans flipped the rebound to Cisneros who tagged the runner 2 feet in front of the bag and turned to throw it around.  The problem is that umpire H. Caray called the runner safe, and Chernobyl II ignited in LCF.

By all means, Coach T-t-thompfthon, ask for help...I'm just here for the 7th inning stretch

 Yes, one play, one pitch, two errors, one horrific call, and Vesuvius now looked like a science fair toy.  54 more minutes of this should be entertaining. 

For 50 of those minutes, it was not.  Black Doug had too much of his own product, and got caught looking.  "Why do they call 'em roofies?  They should be called floories."  The rest of the GoodFellas offense followed suit.  As did the punchless pork pipes, even with their shiny new bat; however, Black Doug and company were giving it away like Taylor Rain (hey, that rhymed)..and AE sports closed the third with a 10-1 lead.

Boom.  Winning.

Nope.

Just "boom."

Adam began the 4th by popping out to RF...then looking for the spot that his first inning thrown ball had hit, and hitting his head on it.  "I only have one speed...GO," said the unfazed cleanup hitter.  Interesting.  That would lead a string of 7 straight outs by Enchilada hitters.  Their swiss cheese defense in those innings brought the score back to 10-9 heading into the final frame with 4 minutes left.

Kay had already gotten his hit for the night on his first at-bat, so he led off with a blast to deep left field for a hard hit out, solidifying his 4 game streak of 1-for-3's.  Cisneros then followed with what easily could've been misconstrued as a bunt on the third base side of the field.  And then.........ran........................the..................rest of the 3 minutes off the clock with his gallop down the baseline.  "It was like watching Chariots of Fire, but without the time delay," said fleet-footed Clint Doege.

Which one is faster, Christmas or Cisneros???

Regardless, the rally was on.  And so was more controversy, because H. Caray asked for help on the his call (safe).  Got the help from the home plate umpire (out), but then over-ruled his help after Coach Thompson gave him an earful (of no doubt profane profanity profanities).  So Cisneros was finally safe on a ball that any 7th grader would've beaten by 3 seconds.  Following Aniol's lineout, Phillip Moltz's beard hit one back up the middle that the GoodFellas weren't amused by.  This after his beard tagged a GoodFellas runner in the junk on a play at the plate.  "Don't run at me...don't pitch to me...you'll be fine," said Moltz after doing the "X" with his arms.  So who steps up to the plate with two on and two out?  Mr. Calm and Collected.  Who goes????  Up the middle.  Hard.  And now there's an argument.  Fans (not of the Enchiladas) are arguing, players are arguing...and Coach Thompson is up.  So he goes?  Up the middle.  Hard. For a two-run, game-clinching single.  And this one is mercifully over.

Game Notes:    AE Sports posted a season low team average of .361.  Half the season is now over, with the 4-1 Enchiladas in first due to their victory over 4-1 IVF earlier this season.  Jason Adam had 2 OF assists.  C Danny Thompson threw out a potential basestealer at 3rd for the first CS of the season.  Jason Hans hit two doubles, running his team leading total to 3, and is very quietly the RBI leader with 10.  Leadoff hitter Jeremy Doege did not show up to the game for undisclosed reasons.  Rumors are that he did not want to take his medicine nor bring the beer for striking out (looking) in Game 4.  There were no fans on the carne cylinders' side of the stands to see this.  None.  Zero.  Crickets. 

ANGRY ENCHILADAS AB R H RBI HR BB K SB AVG T. CISNEROS 2B 4 3 3 2 0 0 0 0 0.800 S. ANIOL RF 4 1 1 1 0 0 0 0 0.500 P. MOLTZ C 3 1 0 0 0 1 0 0 0.375 J. ADAM LCF 4 1 1 0 0 0 0 0 0.556 D. THOMPSON RCF 4 2 2 3 0 0 0 0 0.500 J. HANS 1B 4 1 2 2 0 0 0 0 0.500 L. CROSS P 4 1 1 1 0 0 0 0 0.389 C. DOEGE 3B 3 1 2 1 0 0 0 0 0.462 E. CERVANTES LF 3 1 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.250 C. KAY SS 3 2 1 1 0 0 0 0 0.333 TOTALS 36 14 13 11 0 1 0 0 0.508 BATTING 2B - CISNEROS (3), HANS 2 (3), ANIOL (2) RBI - CISNEROS 2 (5), ANIOL (2), THOMPSON 3 (7), HANS 2 (10), CROSS (4), C. DOEGE (8), KAY (2) GAME DETAILS ATTENDANCE:  0

Bats Disappear in 18-9 Loss to Shock And Awe

Oompa, Loompa, doo-pa-dee-doo
I've got crappy story for you
Oompa, Loompa, doo-pa-dee-dee
No one wrote a blog entry for me.

What do you get when old blue is missing?
A leadoff hitter who will strike out looking.
What if your Mexican stache stays away?
How many runs will score today?

I don't like the look of it.

Oompa, Loompa, doo-pa-dee-da
Enchilada balls did not go far.
Oompa, Loompa, doo-pa-dee-doo
The loss-less season went to poo-poo.
Went to poo poo.

SAN ANTONIO, TX (AP-from 3rd Party reports) - The 3-0 Angry Enchiladas took the field in their maroon alternate "special occasion" jerseys Wednesday night against the 1-2 Shock and Awe squad and their shockingly awful vomit orange attire. If you watched either of the last maroon/orange clashes on national TV, then you know what happened.

The maroon, without their co-founder, inspirational stache, and 66% of their Mexican-ness, had no bite in their Enchilada sauce. Without their pasty-white, 4-year old bat boy; Old Blue trusty softball bat; and 100% of the rest of the ethnicity of the team (including the other 33% of Mexican-ness), it was hopeless. The offense did not show. Leadoff hitter and then-League batting title leader Oompa Doege set the tone by getting sat down BACKWARDS. This led the way to a season low .394 team batting average for the toothless tortilla tubes, and single digit runs for the first time. Meanwhile, per usual, the puke brown offense got miracles from every angle, bleeding grounders through, and exploiting the re-emergence of the angelic fart flauta defense (see "holy"), to the tune of 18 runs. For those of you who don't do maff, AE Sports' undefeated season went the way of Monday's China Harbor lunch in spectacular, doubled-up fashion.

Notes from the Game: Cleanup hitters Jason and Adam both made outs on the same play in the fifth inning, tying him for team lead in GIDP. Rumor is that one of them suffered a concussion while the other pondered a Terry Tate attack on the umpire.

Wonnie Cross (3-1) suffered his first loss of the season.

ANGRY ENCHILADAS
		AB	R	H	RBI	HR	BB	K	SB	AVG
J. DOEGE	LF	4	0	2	2	0	0	1	0	0.786
S. ANIOL	1B	3	1	1	0	0	0	0	0	0.600
C. DOEGE	3B	3	1	1	0	0	0	0	0	0.400
J. ADAM	LCF	3	1	1	2	0	0	0	0	0.643
C. GILPIN	3B	3	1	1	0	0	0	0	0	0.583
D. THOMPSON	RCF	3	1	2	2	0	0	0	0	0.500
P. MOLTZ	RF	2	2	1	1	0	1	0	0	0.600
L. CROSS	P	3	0	1	0	0	0	0	0	0.429
J. HANS	EH	3	1	1	0	0	0	0	0	0.500
C. KAY	SS	3	1	1	1	0	0	0	0	0.333
B. MCNEW	C	3	0	1	1	0	0	0	0	0.400
TOTALS		33	9	13	9	0	1	1	0	0.546
BATTING
2B - DOEGE (2), ADAM (2), GILPIN (2), THOMPSON (2)
GIDP - ADAM
RBI - DOEGE 2 (6), ADAM 2 (9), THOMPSON 2 (4), MOLTZ (3), KAY, MCNEW (3)
GAME DETAILS
ATTENDANCE:  UNK